I don’t have grey hairs yet, but i have been around here long enough to understand some ways that life works.
See, when the Universe, aka GOD brings you blessings, you DO NOT NEED TO STRUGGLE to either have access to them , or keep them. (Please note the Uppercase )
When a gift( be it human or materialistic) is specially prepared for you by God, you do not need to fight to keep it. (You may need to put in some work, but It stays naturally).
At some point in the past I needed a support system. Someone that could stand by me while i achieve my goals. I prayed about it and then, I met someone. A very kind person who was ready to help me move to the next level. But then something was not right.
I struggled. We both struggled.
I’m not a bad person. This person wasn’t a bad person either. I have my flaws, yes but I don’t naturally set out to hurt people or to misbehave. But then it seemed like that was exactly the person I was with this supposedly helpmate of mine.
I struggled. We both struggled.
But this person was ready to stand by me, so I was equally ready to make sacrifices, to make adjustments, in order to get that needed support. I began to cut down on my “excesses”. I became conscious of everything I did just so I wouldn’t hurt this person. I practically lived a life that was somewhat very alien to me. But then I felt it was for a good course. So it was okay.
We both struggled…
I could see that this person wanted to be there for me. But I could also see the struggle and dissatisfaction in them.
You see, in as much as I wanted to move to the next level in my life, i equally cherished my happiness. I knew that I couldn’t keep on being unhappy just because I was ambitious. So, I gave up, and found peace instead.
Fast forward to sometime later, I met someone else… and nobody needed to tell me that this was IT!
Everything went smoothly. I did not ask for anything, everything was offered to me.
I didn’t need to struggle to make this person happy or for them to accept me for who i am.
I didn’t need to explain everything I did just to keep this person. Everything happened naturally. At a point, i felt it was too good to be true. But then, it was true.
This person was able to figure out what I needed. This person was always there, not thinking of the things i did wrong, but thinking of what to do for me, and how to help me become whom i wanted to become: AN INDEPENDENT WOMAN.
Through these experiences, I was able to figure out that the first wasn’t the right one(at least not for me) and for that reason, I struggled and things couldn’t work.
In retrospect, I probably grabbed that “helpmate” because that was what I wanted at the time and so didn’t think twice about it. But because it wasn’t for me, I struggled and it crumbled.
And the second? Because it was made for me, I did not struggle for one day.
You know one thing that amazed me? All the faults that the first person found in me which i suppose were still there when the second person arrived,did not surface . Well at least nothing was said about them by the second person.
I did not hear for one day that (for example),i needed to do something about my attitude. Neither did i have to apologise for anything. Not because I didn’t know how to apologise,but because no fault was found, and so there was nothing to apologize for!
At some point, it seemed to be too good to be true, but it was true.
Gods gifts are perfect!
You can never ever find any faults in His gifts.
The only problem is that it is not always easy to figure out which is His gift and which is not. We mostly find ourselves making “mistakes”, before finding the perfect gift that’s made for us.
But to that, i have a SOLUTION.
Ask Him in prayers for guidance. Trust me, He will be there to guide you and that way, you will not be stressed out chasing after the wrong trains.
TAKE AWAY: You may have to take some wrong paths in life first, before finally finding your feet on the right track. It is normal.
What always matters, is the END.